Tim Minchin - Confessions

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1. Feminism

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I believe that women have the right to walk the streets at night
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without being afraid for their lives
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I believe that women have the right to choose what happens to her body
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Without suffering the judgement of the conservative right

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And I believe that women have the right to wear the clothes they like
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Without being treated like dirt
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And I think we men are pathetic how we seem to judge aesthetic
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As the measure of a woman's worth
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I'm ashamed on behalf of my sex for making women feel like objects

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Fuck I love boobs though, I just really love them
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Fuck I love boobs though, I just wanna rub them
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They're just so jooby, they make me feel groovy
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I would rather watch boobs than a movie
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Be doop be doo. I just really like boobs.





2. Poverty (altruism)



I believe people are entitled to basic human rights

Whether they are rich or their poor

I believe a world where no children are starving

Is a world worth fighting for



And I try to remind myself, even when I'm struggling

How incredibly lucky I am

And I don't think it's ok that the luxuries I crave

Should come at the expense of my fellow man



I'm sure I could give a little more

To alleviate the suffering of the poor.



Fuck I love boobs though.

I just really love them

I don't really mind if I am behind

Below or above them.



They're just so jubbly

They make me feel lovely

I'd rather own boobs than a pub

Be doop be doop doop doo doo doo

I really love boobs.







3. Enviromentalism



I believe the that planet we live in is a living organism

And we must treat her carefully

I don't think we can assume we can just go on consuming

Her resources indefinitely.



The earth's not a bottomless pit

And we can all do our little bit.



Fuck I love boobs though

I just really care for 'em


They're equally fun when they're aged 21


Or octogenarian.



They're just so flappy

They make me feel happy

I'd rather eat boobs than a bap

Be doop be doo

I just really love boobs.




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Evolutionary theory says bosoms are buttock-like protrusions
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Designed to tempt men in situations when
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They can't get a glimpse of your bum
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I find such hypotheses dumb, it's like the one that says
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Lipstick is for making your lips look more
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Like the lips of a happy vagina
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Since they said that I can't look my great aunt in the eye
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Why'd they have to say that, oh why?


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From that first little suck of colostrum
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To the grope of the the nurse in the old people's hostel

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We're just fucking monkeys in shoes

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And I-----e----i

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Will always love boobs
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i Will always love boobs